


You Have a Backup What?

by Starwinder042653



Series: Idiosyncrasies of an Undercover Agent [2]
Category: The Magnificent Seven (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 22:00:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17816279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starwinder042653/pseuds/Starwinder042653
Summary: Ezra's having a bad day, but it gets better.





	You Have a Backup What?

________________________________________

Ezra Standish streamed through the foyer of the ATF building headed for the elevator with Vin Tanner on his heels. 

Vin looked contrite and embarrassed. 

Ezra looked furious, a fact only enhanced by the fact that he was covered from head to foot with muck, mud and assorted unidentified flora. 

Even the security guard at the metal detector didn't have the nerve to try and stop his forward momentum when he sailed through the detector with a snarled: "You know damned well who I am! And how fucking many guns I'm toting!" 

The unspoken part of the threat was clear: I'll be more than happy to shove one up your nose if you get in my way. 

"Tanner?" the guard called after them. 

"Later George. Just tell yer boss it wasn't worth yer life to get in his way when ya know he's authorized personnel." 

"Gottcha." George called back. He'd hear the story eventually. Bet it was a doozy too. Team seven stories were always good. And Tanner and Standish stories? Top of the list grade-A tales! 

Every head in the bullpen turned when Ezra barreled into team seven's office. 

Buck jumped to his feet and moved to stand between Ezra and JD. 

Ezra stopped short, scowling at him. 

Buck and JD had borrowed his Jag to meet with a gun-runner's top underling. They were in the office, but the Jag had not been in the parking garage. 

He stormed up to Buck and stabbed a finger in his chest. "Where the hell is my car?" 

Buck backed off, swallowing hard. 

Ezra followed him still glaring. 

Buck continued to backpedal as he babbled, "Uh, Ez, I'm sorry. I mean really, really sorry. There wasn't anything I could do. I swear…" he trailed off as Ezra's gaze switched to JD. 

"It was my fault," JD said. "We stopped for gas. We were gonna fill the tank up for you since you were nice enough to let us use it and while Buck was in the bath room I… I swear I just turned around for a minute to give some lady directions and---" 

"Someone stole it." Ezra's voice was flat and hard. 

"Uh, well, uh yeah." 

You could have heard a pin drop in the silence that descended. 

Ezra stood stone still then he drew in a deep breath and let it out slowly. He blinked once, twice, three times then said in a perfectly calm tone: "I see." 

He turned to face Larabee. "I am going to change clothes. I will be at least two hours. Mister Tanner will be driving me." 

Larabee nodded, staring at his seething undercover agent. He could tell that the fury was only controlled, not gone. 

"Why me, Ez?" Vin ventured. 

"Your vehicle is already filthy. There is no reason to get someone else's dirty. Besides," he flashed Vin an evil grin, "your day is already fucked." 

He turned to JD, saying, "The Jag is lo-jacked." 

He picked up a pen and scribbled a number and a code on it. 

"Here is the code to activate it and the web address to track it. Get it back. Do it quietly. No sirens. No high-speed pursuit. The Jag has a racing engine. I doubt that there is a car in Denver that could catch it. No shooting. All the glass in the Jag is bulletproof. The entire body is lined with Kevlar. The engine compartment and gas tank are triple lined. The tires are run-flat. Wait until the thieves are outside the car then take it back. Understood." 

JD nodded, grateful that Ezra wasn't going to yell at him. 

Ezra turned away then turned back, pulling his cell phone out of his pocket holding it out to JD, "Oh, see if you can revive this, as well." 

"Sure, Ez," JD was still watching Ezra mesmerized, praying that he really was going to let them off this easily. 

As Ezra turned away again, JD suddenly called, "Ez, wait! Uh…" he hurried to his desk and pulled out a new cell phone. "I just got this. It's top of the line. You can have it." 

Ezra turned back, tilting his head to regard JD for a long moment then nodded, "Thank you, Mister Dunne, for the loan. I would not dream of keeping your new toy. If I like it, I shall purchase one of my own." 

Ezra turned and strode out of the office, head high as if he weren't dripping water, mud and muck with every step. 

Vin followed after, looking as hangdog as if he _were_ the one dripping muck. 

They were silent in the elevator until Vin asked quietly, "You said yer ma bought you the Jag. She have all those extras added on?" 

Ezra grinned, "She did indeed." 

He turned to Vin, "Mother's timing may have sucked but the Jag is love on wheels. She meant for it to keep her darlin' baby boy safe." 

Once they were back in Vin's jeep, Ezra told him to turn left out of the ATF garage then keep straight for five red lights, taking a right at the last one. As soon as they were on the road, Ezra punched a number into the cell phone JD had given him. 

"Hartigan," he addressed whomever answered. "It's me. I'm on my way to the house. I'm in a blue jeep. The driver has shoulder-length brown hair and blue eyes. He is dressed upscale-cowboy in boots, hat, dress jeans, western style shirt and a magnificent beaded and fringed buckskin jacket. Please inform the gate guard that we shall be arriving in approximately twenty minutes. I am looking rather worse for wear, myself. Thank you. Oh, please get the Jacuzzi ready as well. Again, thank you." 

Twenty minutes later they arrived at a gated community on the outskirts of Denver. 

Ezra leaned past Vin to look at the guard and said, "Mister Hartigan is expecting us." 

"Yes, sir." The guard didn't even raise an eyebrow at Ezra's appearance. 

"Huh," Vin opined, "you'd think he saw drowned rats in thousand-dollar suits ever'day." 

Ezra chuckled. "He is most likely glad that I did not appear to be drunk. I suspect he sees a lot of sodden drunks in thousand-dollar suits." 

"So, where are we going?" Vin asked. 

"Second right and straight on until the end of the lane." 

A few minutes later, Vin parked on the paved drive in front of an elegant, brick, manor-style house and got out. "Nice place. This Hartigan an old friend?" 

"You might say that. He's a long-time employee but definitely a friend as well. This is my backup safe house." 

Vin raised an eyebrow at that. "You've got a backup safe house?" 

"Yes. While the agency makes every attempt to keep the location of safe houses secret, it is no secret that their locations can be discovered. This house, on the other hand, is not connected to any federal agency in any way, nor can it be traced back to me. No one here has ever been told my name. I am simply a regular visitor. The house officially belongs to ex-stepfather number two. It is officially leased to Hartigan. Hartigan, himself, is a remnant of that marriage. He was our head of house while Mother was married to Alfred Beaumont." 

"Head of house?" 

"The person in charge of seeing that the household runs smoothly. He oversaw the other employees, managed the household budget, kept the household records, etc. When Mother divorced Alfred she insisted on getting Hartigan as part of the divorce settlement. Of, course, he had to agree to the arrangement. He had grown quite fond of me during the two years that Mother was married to Alfred and when Mother informed him that his primary responsibility would be to look after my needs, he agreed to accept the position. He's been with me ever since." 

He flashed a grin at Vin, "I was nine when Mother divorced Alfred." 

The door opened and a tall, gray-haired man regarded Ezra with a reproving frown. "You need a bath, young sir. The Master bedroom is prepared for you. I have laid out one of the new Armani suits your mother sent. It is a forest green. I believe it will look especially nice on you. I chose the jade green silk shirt and laid out the new Kevlar dress vest, should you think you might need it. It's a lighter green than the suit. I shall leave it to your eye to determine if it will blend well enough with the suit." 

When he stopped for a breath, Ezra quickly put in, "This is my partner, Vin Tanner, Hartigan. He will be using the guest bath for his shower, before joining me in the Jacuzzi." 

"Of course sir," Hartigan continued to talk as he led them through the foyer and up the stairs.

"Miz Maude sent along several pairs of the new Kevlar long johns as well as the new vest. The long johns are not bulletproof but provide some protection from knife attacks and will be quite welcome, I expect, when the weather turns colder. There is also a new jacket, bomber style, bulletproof, level three-A. The new catalog shows a denim jacket that your friend might like, also Level three-A." 

"What size do you wear, Vin?" Ezra asked. 

"It comes in small, medium, large and extra large, not numbered sizes," Hartigan informed Vin before he could answer. 

"Large then. I like a little room," Vin said. "How much do they cost?" 

"Do not concern yourself with that. Mister Beaumont will buy in quantity and distribute them among his employees. One extra won't even be noticed. I'll simply inform him that Ezra wants one as a gift for someone he works with," Hartigan informed him. 

"Don't fight it, Vin. I haven't won an argument with him in twenty years. Just let him mother you. I promise he's not as smothering as Nathan."

"It undermines a young man's confidence to be overbearing in one's attempts to keep them safe." Hartigan sniffed disdainfully. Obviously, this Nathan character could use some instruction in the proper handling of a young gentleman. 

"Them slash-proof long johns come in tops and bottoms?" Vin asked, curious. 

"Not technically but the company has a long-sleeved T-shirt that can be worn as an undershirt. Mister Ezra has several," Hartigan replied.

Ezra winked at Vin and said, "When Mister Larabee is swearing at me for not wearing my bulletproof vest whilst undercover, I usually have on the long-sleeve, slash-proof T-shirt, underneath a bulletproof long-sleeve dress-shirt and the slash-proof long johns under my suit pants. I may also have on a low-profile bulletproof vest under the long-sleeve T-shirt. The briefcase that I carry, when I carry a briefcase, is also bulletproof." 

"So, ya ain't near as reckless as he thinks ya are." 

"Indeed not," Ezra replied. 

They stopped in front of one of the upstairs doors. 

This is the guest room, Mister Tanner," Hartigan informed Vin. "Please make yourself at home." 

Vin looked at the door a bit doubtfully. 

"House rules, Mister Tanner. No one gets in the Jacuzzi without a bath," Ezra told him, "not even me, not even if they do not need one. Although, I'm sure you'll agree, on this occasion I do need one." 

Vin nodded then said, "Ain't got anything to wear in the Jacuzzi, Ez." 

"Well, you could always go au natural. I intend to. However, if you're shy, there are several pairs of swim trunks on a shelf in the bathroom. I'm sure something will fit." 

The look he gave Vin made him blush. 

________________________________________

When Vin stepped out of the shower, he stood for a long moment regarding the shelf filled with swim trunks before deciding to forgo one. If Ez was going au natural he might as well, too. And if Ezra had been teasing, well, he'd learn better'n ta tease a Tanner. 

Decision made he wrapped a towel around his hips and headed out. 

Ezra had told him that the Jacuzzi was in a room off the master bedroom, so he headed down the hall towards the room he'd seen Ezra disappear into. 

The door into the main room of the bedroom suite was standing open. To the right another door stood open and through it Vin could see floor to ceiling windows with sunlight streaming in. He ventured a guess that the Jacuzzi was in there and turned that way. 

He was right. Ezra was already seated in the Jacuzzi, the hot water bubbling around him. He raised an eyebrow at Vin's towel. 

"Ya said that ya was going au natural, figured it'd be impolite to not to do the same," Vin grinned, stepping onto the top step into the sunken Jacuzzi before opening the towel and letting it fall to the tiled surround. 

Ezra's grin spread wide enough for Vin to see his gold canine, "Indeed it would have been." 

Vin sank down into the hot bubbles then cocked his head at Ezra, "So, are ya?" 

"Am I what?" 

"Au natural under all them bubbles. Kinda hard to see from over here." 

"Then why don't you just come over here and find out for yourself?" Ezra grinned. 

Vin grinned back at him and glided through the water to settle on the built-in seat next to Ezra. Laying one hand on Ezra's chest he slowly slid it south, giving Ezra plenty of time to stop him if he decided that he didn't want to play. 

Ezra just sighed, shifting closer to Vin. 

Vin lifted the arm on that side letting Ezra slip under it so that it rested across his shoulders as Vin's hand confirmed that Ezra was, indeed, au natural. 

"So," Vin ventured, "is this how ya plan to punish me fer letting you get all nasty and ruining that fancy suit of yers chasing down that little weasel this morning? Cause I got to tell ya, this don't feel like punishment to me." 

"It wasn't your fault. He was *not* little and if you hadn't stopped him, he might very well have smothered me in that infernally filthy hog wallow. He was doing his best to force my face into the mud when you shot him." 

"So, this is…?" 

"The soak in the Jacuzzi is your reward for saving my life. Anything else that may occur here is a celebration of the fact that we both survived this morning's encounter." 

"Good, cause I wouldn't want this to be about gratitude," Vin said as he pulled Ezra into his arms and kissed him soundly. 

After a long moment, Ezra drew back, "Remind me to send Buck and JD a 'thank you' note. I have imagined a hundred ways to get you into this tub, but none of them included having the Jag stolen." 

"I'll do more'n remind ya. I'll help you pick out a card," Vin replied before pulling Ezra back in for another kiss. 

The End


End file.
